Tuesday, May 22, 2007

Remembering My Friend

Completely off the adoption topic, today I have spent a lot of time in my head and my heart remembering my friend. On May 22, 2000, Nichole Pisano lost her battle with cancer at the age of 32 years old. Nikki left behind many friends, wonderful family, and the most tragic of all, 2 beautiful little girls.
Her daughters, who are my God Daughters, Demecia Hope, now age 10 and Grace Edith, now age 8, are two of the most incredible kids I have ever had the pleasure of being involved with! I will be eternally grateful to Nikki for allowing me to serve as the girls God Mother and hope everyday that I am following her wishes and living up to my responsibility in helping the girls grow into the exceptional women I am sure they are meant to be!
Beyond the relationship with these 2 girls, because of my friendship with Nikki, Tom and I are both part of a whole new family. Nikki's bio family are just as much part of my heart and due to logistics more of a part of my daily life that my own. I can't imagine my life now without any of them.
I miss Nikki terribly. I never before and am sure will never again experience such a friendship. We had some sort of connection that could not be explained, the same thoughts, the same feelings, the same spirit and definitely the same unusual sense of humor. Those close to us both saw it and sometimes were amazed by it. I had never before laughed...out loud...the uncontrollable laughter, that makes your eyes water, your nose run...when you can't stop and you loose your breath...that kind of laughter is what Nikki and I shared on such a regular basis. It makes me smile even now as I type this to think about it!
I loved Nikki. I respected her for her kindness, openness, dedication, her strength and love was beyond measure!

A few months ago we took Demecia and Grace to see the new version of Charlotte's Web. My ALL TIME FAVORITE childhood book. Towards the end of the movie when Charlotte dies, Demecia got a little teary eyed. Then Charlotte's babies where born and some of them went away, but several of them stayed in the barn with Wilbur and Wilbur gave them a speech about how he wanted to tell them about their mother....about what a wonderful "person" she was and about the great friend she had been. I pulled Demecia on my lap and put my arms around Grace and told them both, "see, that's like us...you guys are like the baby spiders and I am like Wilbur who is there to keep the love, spirit and memory of your mommy alive".
As I choked down the lump that had risen in my throat just before the theater lights came up, I had to smile. I had to laugh to myself, because I just knew that somewhere Nikki was watching and laughing...taking pleasure in the fact that I was the "simple pig" and she was the "eloquent beautiful spider".
Nikki was my best friend and I will miss her forever, but when I remember her, I always smile.